The Best Gifts for Men, Manly Men, and Menly Man Men
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There are gifts for men and there are manly gifts for manly men men. You’ve probably read a hundred gift guides that suggest buying the man in your life things like a tie, a leather belt, or literally anything whiskey-related. That’s not manly enough for us, though. We wanted to round up the manliest gifts for men, no matter how over-the-top or hypermasculinized they are. For this guide, we're not just looking for things like regular soap, but soap with the word “men” on it. Enjoy.
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- Photograph: Eric Ravenscraft
For Smelling as Fresh as Aged Whiskey
Mando Whole Body DeodorantYou can tell that Mando Deodorant is designed for men (or, possibly, bounty hunters) because it’s got “man” right there in the name. It comes in various scents like Pro Sport or Mt. Fuji that you might’ve seen only somewhat manly deodorant brands offer, but it also comes in extra manly scents like bourbon leather. I initially assumed this would smell like a leather belt soaked in whiskey, and after trying it, I was … not wrong. I can only further assume this is a desirable smell for some people.
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For Trimming Your Hedge
BALLS V3 Archibald Electric RazorSome companies try to be subtle when marketing products aimed at grooming your junk, with euphemisms like “Look your best, all over.” Others will be cheeky, like the aforementioned Crop Soother. Then there's BALLS. Cofounded by Matt Edge and Tyler Ball (what are the odds?), this company makes electric razors like the Archibald trimmer specifically aimed at trimming hair in hard-to-trim places.
What makes this different from a typical razor? It’s completely waterproof, so you can even use it in the shower. It also has a small LED under the razor, so you can better see what you’re doing down where the sun doesn’t shine. Beyond that, the razor performs pretty well in terms of shaving without nicking sensitive skin, which would be enough to recommend it without all the bells and whistles.
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For Powerful Coffee
Moccamaster KGBV Select Coffee MakerJust look at that name: Moccamaster. This is a coffeemaker that drinks and breathes pure power and precision. The Moccamaster is burly. It makes old-school drip coffee, none of that fancy Starbucks stuff. But what the manly man in your life should truly love about the Moccamaster is that it’s real hand-tooled craftsmanship. It is perhaps the world’s only high-end coffee maker that looks like a power tool made by DeWalt, and it is just as sturdy. It’s been handmade since 1968 in Holland, a country where their idea of a party is mostly just blowing things up. The precision-made Moccamaster will keep your coffee within a four-degree range for optimum brewing. And its parts can be replaced or repaired, just like the engine of an old car. Judging from others’ experience, it’ll probably last you decades. What a machine. Moccamaster. —Matthew Korfhage
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The Manliest Jacket
Huckberry Waxed Trucker JacketWaxed canvas is a man's fabric. Gore-Tex doesn't even work the way it claims too, manly men know this and opt for the tried and true weather resistance of waxed canvas. Waxed canvas sheds rain like water rolls off a duck’s back. Or a waxed duck's back. Or something. You won't get wet, okay? And yeah, waxed canvas isn't breathable. When you're working hard—always, ammirite?—you'll probably sweat in this thing. So what?
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For Pockets in Pockets in Pockets in …
Ten Thousand Tactical PantThe most I ever have to think about tactics is when I play real-time strategy games. So unless I can run automated macros on a pair of pants, I’m not clear on what makes them “tactical.” Fortunately, my colleague Scott Gilbertson has decreed these pants the most tactical. They look great—which is to say, not like trash bags—and have plenty of pockets. I’m talking pockets inside other pockets. If you care more about practicality than fashion but don’t want to look like it, these are the pants for you.
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For Carrying Stupid Heavy Loads. Because You Can.
GoRuck GR1The GoRuck GR1 is an incredibly comfortable pack, but don't hold that against it. Throw in a 30lb Ruck Plate ($120) and somewhere around the 100 mile mark in your ruck you should begin to sweat blood. The GR1 is a bomb proof pack, possibly literally, but that's probably classified. The outside of the pack is made of 1000 Denier Cordura (for comparison most of the outdoor industry gets by with 210, maybe 500 if a company is trying to man up). Here's what we know: if the GR1 is manly enough for former SEALs and Green Berets, it's manly enough for the man you're giving a gift. —Scott Gilbertson
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For Action-Packed Showers
Duke Cannon Supply Co. Tactical ScrubberThe Duke Cannon Supply Co. Tactical Scrubber is the soap accessory a man needs when they have to take a shower while jumping out of an airplane. The scrubber has a thick mesh that helps create a thick lather, and there’s a handy strap to hang it up. A strap the company highlights is made of 550 mil-spec paracord, the kind of cord used in parachute suspension lines (and, sometimes, jewelry).
It pairs with the company’s Big Brick of Soap, or, as it’s called when you’re not searching on Amazon, Big Ass Brick of Soap. The “ass” makes it more manly. The soap block doesn’t feel that much bigger than a typical bar of soap, but it’s at least nice to see a company go in the opposite direction of shrinkflation. My only real complaint is that the branding for this particular product could stand to avoid all the cutesy don’t-drop-the-soap jokes.
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For Super Soft Brillo Beards
Duke Cannon Supply Co. Best Damn Beard OilIf there’s one thing I’ve learned while rounding up all these manly men gifts, it’s that if you put words Amazon doesn’t like in a product’s name, that immediately makes it more manly. To wit, there’s Duke Cannon’s Best
DamnBeard Oil. I have scratchy facial hair and usually prefer not to grow a beard because of it. However, this beard oil helps prevent ingrown hairs and makes facial hair feel softer to the touch. Though, please note, the bottle says explicitly that it’s “not for clowns,” so don’t buy this for any Pagliaccis in your life.
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For the Bathroom Bar
Cremo Rich-Lathering Body WashHas your man ever been in the shower and thought, “Man, I could use a drink”? If so, this bottle of body wash from Cremo might be for them. Uh, not that anyone should drink body wash. This container looks a lot like a whiskey bottle. Whiskey is the most manly of mild poisons, of course. This is an older design, though the new look still looks pretty whiskey-esque. Either way, if they'd like their shower to look more like a home bar than a bathroom, it's the way to go.
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For the Bedroom
Gun Oil LubeIt's a bottle of lube in the shape of a bullet. How much more manly can you get? Indeed, the company's YouTube channel leans heavily into advising men doing manly things, like laying pipe and cooking sausages. Thankfully, this lube is quite viscous and even made it into our Best Lubes guide.
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For Soothing the Most Sensitive Razor Burn
Manscaped Crop SootherSifting through all the euphemisms companies use instead of plain language for body parts is usually pretty easy, but I got stumped by Manscaped's use of “crop” to refer to its line of ball care products. The Crop Soother, for example, is an aftershave lotion specifically designed for the sensitive skin of your nether regions. You know that sting you get from typical aftershaves you use on your face? Well, it’s worse downstairs, which is what this lotion is formulated to prevent.
Manscaped also sells groin-centric deodorant (“Crop Preserver”), aloe-infused toner (“Crop Reviver”), and body wipes (“Crop Mops”), all of which could be named literally anything else but are, unfortunately, not.
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For Wiping Down Your Dudes
Dude WipesIf your good, strong hands are too powerful to use normal wet wipes without accidentally shredding them to pieces, then you’re gonna need Dude Wipes. WIRED reviewer Louryn Strampe swears by them for surviving festivals where a shower might be in short supply. They’re large and pretty durable, as wet wipes go. They also come in black packaging, which is very important to maximize manliness.
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A Knife for Life
Benchmade Crooked River KnifeMen carry knives. Always. You just never know when you're going to need to cut something. Some men like the everything-and-the-kitchen-sink Swiss Army Champ ($125), but the simplicity of a folding knife has its own manly appeal. Benchmade knives are not cheap, but they're pretty near indestructible, and have a lifetime warranty. Benchmade will even sharpen it for you if you're not man enough to do it yourself. —Scott Gilbertson
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A Crate of Menly
Man Crates World Tour Jerky CrateWhat could be more manly than beef jerky? Beef jerky that arrives in a crate with a “Man Crates” brand stamped on the sides. That you have to open with a crowbar. That’s also stamped “Man Crates”. This crate deeply upset me because I was struggling to open it with the included, tiny, useless crowbar. (I’m not very manly.) I used my womanly charms on it, also known as prying it open with a screwdriver while swearing a lot and contemplating running it over with my car. Luckily, the nine different varieties of jerky inside are gender-inclusive—and delicious. I especially liked the spicy-sweet bacon jerky and the savory sausages, and I know any jerky enthusiast would find something in this crate that delighted them. And I suppose the Prising of the Crate is fun, which is why I’m going to re-glue the lid on and use it as packaging for a gag gift this holiday season. —Louryn Strape
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For Character-Building Snacks
Mantry Food Subscription BoxPantries are like closets for food. If that doesn’t sound sufficiently manly, then Mantry snack boxes can help add some testosterone to your snacks. Each box comes with snacks (or condiments) including beef jerky, hot sauce, and dark chocolate infused with bacon. We initially critiqued this box for having more ingredients than snacks, but that means this subscription is more DIY than ready-made, and doing it yourself—regardless of whether it’s unnecessarily complicated—builds character. Manly character.
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For Protein-Packed Pancakes
Kodiak Power Cakes Flapjack and Waffle MixDo you need a more powerful pancake? A weightier waffle? A more formidable flapjack? Don’t we all? The Kodiak Power Cakes mix delivers 14 grams of protein into a single pancake. Just add water (or milk and eggs for bonus protein). This might not be marketed specifically at manly men, but this pancake mix is prominently branded with a giant bear. And what’s more manly than a bear?
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